Dear friend-who's-trying-so-hard-to-please-every-single-person every single day.

You can't do it, and that's ok. In fact, heck, it's not even possible.

There are some folks who are going to choose not to reciprocate your kindness and friendliness, NO matter what you do. You can speak and wave, give genuine smiles, provide words of encouragement in person (and on social media), and go out of your way to be extra kind in every encounter, but there are some people who are just NOT going to return this to you.

To add to your frustration, you may even witness them being overly kind and friendly to (specific) others, but still not to YOU.
And even with that in mind, the thing you must realize is, it's NOT really about YOU (even though it may seem that way). Whatever holds someone back from returning your kindness is totally about them. Some people will only be friendly and kind when there's some kind of benefit for themselves.

Maybe there's nothing that "you" can do that will feed whatever need this person has. Maybe there's a hidden grudge buried deep inside them. Maybe there's jealousy that they aren't really aware of and would never acknowledge. You can bet that there are inner hurts, fears, and insecurities that they're dealing with that no one will ever really know. Keep in mind that hurting people hurt other people.
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Whatever it is, don't personalize their behavior. Just keep showing compassion for yourself and for others and being as kind as possible every single day. We've all got our own crosses to bear, and we're all just doing the best that we can.

There's a quote that I frequently read repeatedly.  It's part of a speech that
was given by Steve Jobs:  "Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone
else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking.
Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most
importantly, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow
already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary." ~
Steve Jobs 
 
How powerful is that?  The older I get, the more I appreciate free thinkers.... those
who don't just blindly go along with the crowd.  And not only that, but
this quote makes ME feel so much more empowered to be who I am, and not an
imitation of anyone else.... even with all of my many faults and
other not-always-awesome qualities, I'm still ok... And as another quote
goes, "Wanting to be someone else is a waste of who you are."
 
And one more brilliantly wise quote along the same order ~  “To be yourself in a world
that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest
accomplishment.” - Ralph W. Emerson
 
So I hope you'll join me today - don't waste another minute trying to be someone or
something you're not.... be a rebel... be true to yourself... be YOU!

 

 

                         About a month ago I decided that it might be a good idea to make a video for this site.  I thought it would be nice for potential clients to be able to sort of "get a feel for who I am" if they didn't already know me.  Well I had NO idea what I was getting into - ha.... It seemed real simple at first.... just write down what I wanted to say.... then record it....that's it... right?
                    Well it turns out it wasn't so simple after all.  It's really surprising once you consider all of the things that impact making a video... sound quality -  (be loud enough to be heard, but not so loud that I sound annoying or like I'm SHOUTING --- plus make sure no phone rings/dog barks/person talks/etc. in the background!)..... the lighting.... finding the right place to do the recording (since I was using my laptop camera, I was a one-man show --- and it was tricky getting the computer just the right height, too)  .... enunciating without sounding silly (trying to make sure I'm understood and that I don't have toooooo much of a Southern twang - harder than I thought!).... making sure the background looked ok (had to hide all the dog toys).... and the hardest part was trying to face the camera as much as possible without constantly looking at my notes (now I really understand the concept of how helpful that whole teleprompter thing must be....)
                  Once I had practiced some and had gotten everything set up, I recorded..... and recorded....and recorded....  it turned out to be really tricky to record the whole thing all the way through, smile, look at the camera, enunciate, speak with expression, not stutter, and not stumble over any of the words.... yikes - who knew?!  Well I do know one thing for sure now... I have a new appreciation for all those people who video-blog --- they are brave and determined souls!
                The video is certainly nothing professional - ha, but hopefully I did get my points across.  If you can't access it on here for some reason, I just uploaded it to youtube (another first for me!) ----- here's the link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dJ3D8VAmhE&feature=youtu.be
                
                Making this video was a real challenge for me --- it's pretty hard to put yourself "out there" and open yourself up for possible negativity or criticism ~ however, I'm working to face my fears and conquer some challenges in 2013 ~ hopefully you are, too!  Well, Happy New Year to you and yours ~ Hoping 2013 will be your most rewarding and prosperous year yet!